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In the Bible, When Can You Divorce?

by Mia

Divorce is a complex and sensitive issue that many people face in life. In the Bible, divorce is addressed in various passages, offering guidance on when it may be permissible and when it is not. While the Bible upholds the sanctity of marriage and the ideal of a lifelong commitment between a husband and wife, it also acknowledges the reality of human brokenness and offers some exceptions when divorce may be allowed. This article will explore the biblical teachings on divorce, focusing on when it may be permissible according to Scripture.

The Biblical View of Marriage

1. Marriage Is Sacred and a Lifelong Commitment

The Bible presents marriage as a sacred covenant established by God. In the book of Genesis, marriage is portrayed as part of God’s original design for humanity. When God created man and woman, He instituted marriage as a union meant to last a lifetime. In Genesis 2:24, it says,
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

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Jesus also reaffirms the lifelong nature of marriage in the New Testament. In Matthew 19:4-6, Jesus quotes from Genesis and says,

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“Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Here, Jesus emphasizes that marriage is not just a human arrangement but a divine institution, meant to reflect God’s design for unity and commitment. Marriage is not easily broken, and God’s desire is that husbands and wives remain together for life.

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2. Divorce Was Not Part of God’s Original Plan

In the beginning, God’s perfect plan for marriage was one of unity, love, and faithfulness. Divorce was never part of God’s ideal for marriage. However, because of human sin and the hardness of people’s hearts, God allowed for the possibility of divorce in certain situations. Jesus addressed this in Matthew 19:7-8, saying,

“Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.”

Here, Jesus acknowledges that while divorce may be allowed due to human sinfulness, it was not part of God’s original plan for marriage.

Biblical Exceptions for Divorce

1. Marital Unfaithfulness (Adultery)

One of the primary reasons the Bible permits divorce is marital unfaithfulness, or adultery. In Matthew 19:9, Jesus explicitly states,

“And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

This passage teaches that when one spouse is unfaithful to the other through adultery, the innocent spouse may be allowed to divorce the unfaithful partner. Adultery is a serious violation of the marital covenant and breaks the trust and unity that should exist between husband and wife.

Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:32 also support this exception:

“But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”

In these passages, Jesus acknowledges that adultery is a valid reason for divorce, as it undermines the foundation of the marriage covenant.

2. Abandonment by an Unbelieving Spouse

Another situation in which the Bible permits divorce is when an unbelieving spouse abandons a believing spouse. In 1 Corinthians 7:12-15, the Apostle Paul gives guidance on this matter, saying,

“To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him.

For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called us to peace.”

In these verses, Paul addresses the situation where one spouse is a believer and the other is not. If the unbelieving spouse chooses to leave the marriage, the believer is not bound to the marriage and may be permitted to divorce. Paul highlights that the believer is called to peace and is not enslaved to a marriage in which the other spouse chooses to abandon them.

3. Physical Abuse and Danger to Life

While the Bible does not explicitly address physical abuse in the context of divorce, many biblical principles imply that if a spouse’s physical safety is in jeopardy, separation may be necessary for protection. 1 Corinthians 7:15 suggests that a believer is not bound in the case of abandonment, which could also apply to situations where physical abuse is present.

In these situations, it is important for the abused spouse to seek safety, protection, and counseling. If the abuse is ongoing and unrepentant, divorce may be considered as a way to protect the well-being of the abused spouse.

4. Marriage to an Unbeliever Under Certain Conditions

While 1 Corinthians 7 speaks about situations where a believer is married to an unbeliever, Paul suggests that divorce is not necessary if the unbeliever is willing to live in peace with the believer. However, if the unbeliever chooses to depart the marriage, the believer is free to divorce.

Paul’s teaching here emphasizes the importance of peace in the marriage and highlights that a believer should not be trapped in a relationship that endangers their spiritual or emotional well-being.

The Importance of Reconciliation

1. God’s Desire for Reconciliation

Although the Bible permits divorce in certain situations, it is clear that God’s desire is for reconciliation whenever possible. In Malachi 2:16, God says,

“For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

God expresses His displeasure with divorce and urges couples to work toward reconciliation. The ideal in marriage is that husbands and wives would seek forgiveness, restoration, and healing in their relationship, rather than choosing to separate.

Jesus also emphasized the importance of forgiveness in marriage. In Matthew 18:21-22, when Peter asks how many times he should forgive someone, Jesus replies,

“I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

This teaching on forgiveness can be applied to marriage, where spouses are called to forgive one another and seek to restore their relationship rather than resorting to divorce.

2. Seeking God’s Guidance

For those facing marital difficulties, the Bible encourages seeking God’s guidance and support. Prayer, counseling, and seeking wisdom from the church community are all important steps in addressing marital problems. James 1:5 promises,

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

God is willing to help those who seek His wisdom, and He desires to help marriages heal and grow in His love.

Conclusion

The Bible acknowledges the brokenness of the human heart and allows for divorce in certain situations, such as adultery and abandonment by an unbelieving spouse. However, the Bible also upholds the sanctity of marriage as a lifelong commitment and urges couples to work toward reconciliation whenever possible. God’s desire is that husbands and wives live in peace, love, and unity, reflecting His covenant with His people. While divorce may be permitted in certain cases, believers are called to seek God’s wisdom, pursue forgiveness, and honor the covenant of marriage to the best of their ability.

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